All my life when I thought about having a family there was always a little girl in the picture. Well, in November of 2015 our little girl finally came into the picture. She was given a name fit for a princess with two knights for brothers to love and protect her.
Like most little girls she loves all things girl related- babies, barbies, dress up- you get the point. Right off the bat, I realized that raising a girl is a lot different than raising boys. For example, the boys typically don’t care what they wear on a day to day bases, but Annabella cares a lot about her outfits. In this way, she is a lot different than me. Growing up I didn’t put a lot of thought into the clothes I wore outside of modesty.
However, one of the biggest differences that I see in Miss Annabella is her Diva side. Sometimes it seems as if she can go from a sweet little girl to a demanding diva with a flip of her hair. And boy, does she have one even at age two. Now don’t get me wrong, Annabella is very loving, compassionate, and funny. She is a blessing that I love very much. But, Annabella definitely does have a diva side.
How do you know you are dealing with a diva?
- If she takes everything to the heart very deeply. Even the smallest of infractions.
- If she puts a lot of time and energy into fighting mom in her opinion. She tells it like it is with no filter.
- If she does things like picks out her own outfits with attitude or spunk. (My daughter started this right after she turned two). My daughter hates to wear pants. If you are in the same boat I recommend the book Princesses Wear Pants.
Dealing with a red-headed diva is not easy at times. Here are some tips I have found helpful that we use on daily bases with all our children not just our little diva.
How I handle the diva side?
- Clear rules. There are consequences.
- We expect manners
- Quality time
- Teach kindness, love, and patience. Set the example.
Rules and Consequences
Having rules in a home seems pretty basic, right? Everyone has them. However, if there are no consequences then the rules are pointless. Early on in my parenting journey, I struggled with the follow through and I didn’t have much of a backbone. Do you know the moment I’m talking about? The moment when your “sour patch kid” turns sweet again. Yeah, I often fell to the sour patch kid moments. But you learn from living. and I’m here to tell you don’t go down that road. Stay strong.
Helpful Tip: Something I found helpful was the use of if-then statements. If you do this… then here is your consequence. This is so helpful with little ones that may not fully comprehend other ways.
The use of manners in a home is vital in many ways and one way is battling the diva side. In my home, we use the everyday manners like please and thank you. In addition, we also use yes sir, no sir, yes ma’am, and no ma’am. We view it as a simple sign of respect. However, the term manners are defined differently in every home and that’s okay. Every parent should do what they feel is right for their family.
Quality Time Together
Spending time with your children is very important to building a strong foundation of respect, love, and togetherness. Creating a strong bond with your diva is needed to help her developmental growth and for her to grow up knowing that she can come to you with anything, even the smallest of conflicts with siblings. Doing activities that your diva loves shows her that she matters and that mommy and/or daddy love her hobbies too.
Teach about the Fruits of the Spirit
“The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” ~ Galatians 5:22-23
Let your children “eat” of the greatest fruit ever, the fruit of the spirit. These fruits will expand the minds of children to not only understand how to dim the diva but also come even close to understanding the love that Jesus has for them.
I know the struggle is real with the little divas of the world. Believe me, momma, I am right there with you. Take heart this is only a season that will soon pass and then our divas will be teenagers.
Yikes, that is a scary thought. Am I right?